#postpartum

Sometimes motherhood kicks you in the face.

#andyoucanquotemeonthat

I started to write a blog post last night but I don't love it, so I'm gonna try to summarize.

Ya'll. Life with two is cray-cray.

I have piles. Just piles of stuff everywhere. And it doesn't matter how productive I think I am one day - the piles reappear the next day! Mocking me, as if I've done nothing. How one tiny human suddenly triples our laundry is beyond me. I mean, she alone is not using all those towels and wearing all those clothes. But it's tripled, I promise.

I'm tired. And hungry. I alternate between these two because:

a. I have above referenced tiny human wanting to eat every few hours. Therefore I have to eat every few hours - or every few minutes. Breastfeeding hunger is like none other, surpassing even a preggo's appetite. It's craziness and I read it best described as a low hum that's always there...or something like that. Whatever food you do eat only serves to quiet the hum briefly. But it's. always. there.

b. I don't get enough sleep at night. Because of a.

I've now dealt with mastitis once and clogged ducts twice. It's fun times.

As soon as I think I'm somewhat pulling it together - this whole mom of two thing - it kicks me in the face. The saving grace is that a good day usually follows a bad one but it can work vice versa too.

I really find myself so much less emotional with Krosby than I was with Karlyn. Which is good I think! Both Ryan and I have admittedly joked, "Is she five yet?"

Because, if you didn't know, five is easier than 7 weeks. It just is.

I love that little chunk-muffin though, even if she prevents me from leaving her presence for more than a few hours or feeling like my old human - with it and slightly together - self.

What else? I know there's more. I got upset this afternoon because I couldn't pull an outfit together to go somewhere. Yes, I have clothes that fit but they don't feel and look right to me. Tops are a joke. Is there a semi-cute nursing-friendly top out there? If so, I will buy it in every color. I need new shoes. I bought cute new wedge booties but apparently the pants that work with them are not in my closet.

The baby was crying. The older one was sleeping off a cold on the couch. I was already dreading an hour and a half drive + traffic and the clothes were the final straw.

We'll just stay home and watch Andy Griffith. In yoga pants. Because they always fit. #AmIRight

Motherhood is the greatest job on earth. And the hardest. The longest. And the shortest. The most exhilarating and so, so exhausting.

We didn't have a bad day! But sometimes, life just takes over and you wave the white flag. You also pull out the jumbo Reese's you won at a white elephant Christmas game and slice into that bad boy. **2 lbs. of chocolate? what the what.**

Because I have no shame when it comes to chocolate's ability to heal all wounds. Even silly ones, like the wrong pants.

To all my moms out there - hang in there. It gets better, so they say. :-)