Out with the old...

We're hours away from the new year and it's hard to believe that 2013 is coming to a close. The first half of this year was difficult and the second half was busy. We lost another baby in March and then in June decided to put money down on a lot to build a house. We sold our first home and lived with Ryan's parents while our new house was being built. We moved in during "Icemageddon" weekend and without time to blink, I threw Karlyn's third birthday party and hosted Christmas Eve for my immediate family. Whew.

I don't know what my hopes are for this next year. Is it just me? Everything I see lately is... 2014 is going to be YOUR BEST YEAR YET. "This is your year." The best is yet to come. Those are fun, optimistic and positive messages but I have a hard time letting myself go there. I'm scared to lay my hopes out again. I'm wondering if I should just let it go. A mom and friend I greatly respect wrote this post on, "What comes After the Pain?" Such a comforting message but hard at the same time.

I read this today and it's true. It's so easy to make BIG resolutions and commitments but motivation and that initial burst of excitement and resolve only go so far. Daily choices are what affect things the most. Choosing to read my Bible when I don't feel like it. Choosing to apologize after a fight with my husband. Choosing to workout when I'm tired. God is working in the little moments even when I don't see it. 

I do have some goals or things I'd like to accomplish this year. I want to blog more. Read more. Make our house a home and decorate. Learn more about essential oils and expand my collection. Spend time as a family reading the Bible and memorizing verses. Be intentional in my giving to others. Workout consistently, specifically lifting weights. Gain muscle. 

I've actually taken a step towards that last one. I signed up to work with a coach through online personal training! It's pretty cool and I'll complete my second workout tomorrow. Today my triceps HURT, but it's good. I needed a push. Seriously though, I'm going to die tomorrow. #LegDay

2013 brought us to a new home and for that I am so thankful. I really am. We are blessed to be here and blessed that Ryan and I have jobs that the Lord has provided through. We are blessed by our families who lives close. Blessed by our friends and our church. Blessed by HIS grace when we don't deserve it. I'm not perfect and I'm not even close. I'm so flawed and have such puny faith. I find comfort in the fact that God made me to be me and that He has a plan for my life. He made me with a purpose in mind and right now that is to be a wife and mom to these two. (Plus rainbow bear). They are my greatest gifts.

I welcome this new year. I can't say that I'm anxious to see what it holds but that I will step out and continue walking the path laid before me. One step at a time.

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